Right, let’s get the awkward AF intro out of the way. I’m Carrie, and I have Depression. Not an ideal identifier, but it’s why I’m here, so why not make it the main one. And yes, I served that bitch with a capital D because she has been hovering over me non-stop for the past 3-plus years. I also deal with anxiety, low self-worth, suffer from mommy/daddy issues, and have been creatively burned out for longer than I care to admit. Essentially, I’m a mental-health mess of a millennial who is so fucking over it.
So, I’m here. What is here exactly?
Count this as a diary of sorts. A record of a journey that feels never-ending. A place to spit out the negative thoughts so they’re out of my head. A reminder of the better days because I need to remember that I do have those. For me, it’s those things anyway. For you, it might be somewhere you don’t feel as alone in your mental health struggle. A little nudge that the good days do exist. A thing to laugh about and comment, I’ve fucking been there. Because as much as I want to pout and whine that my brain sucks, I know everything I experience is relatable to so many others. Maybe they find this. Maybe they don’t. It’s here just in case.
DISCLAIMER: Before I go further, I need to say, I have zero training as a mental health professional. If that’s something you’re looking for, please reach out of someone licensed who can give you the help you deserve. This is for entertainment purposes only (mine mostly), and doubles as somewhat of a therapy assignment.
Now, let me set the guidelines.
With this being a part of my mental wellness journey, I know there will be days when writing here is the last thing I want to do, but it’s important to me that I show up–in whatever way I can. Here is what I promise myself:
- I will write a post every day (even if I publish Sunday’s post on Monday)
- Every post has a gif/picture/video
- Each post ends with a song
The rest will depend on the day. Maybe it will just be my current mood or my iced-coffee order for the day. But most likely it will be deeper. More vulnerable. Which I hate being with people closest to me, so why not put it on the internet to see.
I don’t know what this will end up as, but I do know one thing…
I’ll be back tomorrow.
Which am I today?
This has been stuck in my head allllllll day